Soul Asylum

"And so it begins," Carrie said, and so it does.

I asked Maggie who took the foam letters out of the mat we have, strewing them across the floor, and she said Darcy. We asked Darcy, and she said, "Maggie did it." Only 15 years to go....

To pick up on a path I didn't take the other night, when I twisted the legend of Barbie, some of my favorite movies are ones I would never have seen without children in my life. The list includes:

*Shrek (only the first);
*Monsters Inc.;
*Finding Nemo;
*Nightmare Before Christmas;
*Robots;
*Iron Giant
*Scary Godmother (only the first);
*Aladdin;
*Lion King;
*Emperor's New Groove
*Toy Story (the first)
*Bug's Life

In the interest of space and time--I'm starting to conquer both--I'll stop there. My standards are only that there are memorable lines (meaning I repeat them around the house) and/or characters. I don't need to like the whole movie; some of them I lose interest in after a rock-em, sock-em first hour, like Robots or Shrek or Lion King, even. In order, here are why I picked some of the above, most of which you know, a couple of which I hope you try.

Shrek's strength is its fearless embrace of the gross--his opening bath and evening meal are rife with yukky detail, and some dialogue is similar. Describing the goo inside eyeballs, Shrek says, "It's quite good on toast." Bonus: I like to try to imagine Cameron Diaz once the princess enters the tale.

Monsters Inc. is probably my favorite, overall. There are stretches of the others that I must see, but MI lasts for me usually until they are banished to the snowy area. The oft-repeated lines and exchanges are too many to mention, but off the top:

--"I'm watching you Wiesowski, always watching."
--"Hi Sully Wully." "Uh, Hi, Celia...Weelia."
--"You and me, me and you, both of us together (sung)"
--"Kitty!"
--"Chalooby, baby."
--"Googly Bear!"

Finding Nemo I was just quoting today: "You know, parties are fun," as only Albert Brooks could say it. The sharks scene is chock full: "I never knew my father!" "What's a couple of bites like you doing in a place like this?" Dory brings a lot, as almost everything she says related to her short-term memory loss is funny. In the fish tank, the initiation is good--"Shark Bait hoo ha ha." "Shark Bait, newcomer of orange and white." The old man halibut chasing the kids in a circle, because of his unique eye arrangement. The dentist comes through with "Gotta see a man about a wallaby."

I can't say enough about Nightmare Before Christmas. It won't scare your kids as much as you think. The songs are awesome, the freaky animation and design and characters are a treat. So many fantastic lines are from the songs, several of which stick in your head like brain paste. Spoken lines: the wheelchair inventor/doctor's "Sally? Oh, gone agayne!" "Frog's Breath? Nothing's more suspicious than frog's breath." "You're mine you know, I made you." His words are striking as much for what they say as their cadence. The Mayor: "Jack, Jack? I can't make decisions, I'm only an elected official." The whole scene when Jack gets the town together to explain Christmas is so tasty--when he explains stockings, and a Halloween character asks if there are feet in them still.

Robots I hardly remember any lines from, but it's so fun to watch. The animation and drawing is so cool, and the scene when Rodney travels to the big city in a crazy contraption with I think the Robin Williams character is amazing. Memorable action and lines come from the parents putting Rodney together, meshing baby routines with assembling a machine and the scene where the gatekeeper rudely mocks and dismisses an eager and naive Rodney is great. "Come back five years ago."

We've had an Iron Giant revival around here in the past month--the twins love it. Brad Bird is a genius. Highlights include the government agent's various nicknames for Hogarth--Slugger, Chief, Scout, Buddy, Pal--shown in a montage. When Hogarth says grace while trying to shoo the robot's hand you'll chuckle mightily. Same when Hogarth drinks espresso for the first time. His ultra-Twinkies are very cool, too. Bonus is the Cold War history lesson. Highly recommended.

Scary Godmother may be the most obscure here, but it's a hoot. A younger girl is thrown into a supposedly haunted house so she will want to go home so the older kids can trick or treat faster. As she cries, her Scary Godmother appears and whisks the girl to the godmother's house in an alternate reality. There is about to be a party, and the guests are a foppish, self-important, always hungry and verbose werewolf; a flamingly gay skeleton; a vampire family; a many-eyed monster named Bugaboo. The skeleton alone makes this well worth the rental--his gayness is never explained, even in the bonus features with the cast and crew, but there is no other description for his voice and the things he says. I'm guilty of stereotyping, but there are stereotypes for a reason. There are memorable lines every other minute. Highly recommended.

Aladdin and Lion King might not be here except they share awesome villains--Skar and Jafar. So professionally evil. The exchange between Jafar and Princess Jasmine after Aladdin's arrest makes me swoon every time. His long face, cheshire-cat grin, skeletal fingers. "Your father has charged me with keeping the peace in Agraba." "What was the charge?" Why, kidnapping the prin-cess, of course." "I was running away!" "Oh, how dreadfully upsetting, had I but known." When he puts his hands on Jasmine, finger by finger, like a spider's walk, to comfort her, it's delicious. Skar's exhanges with Simba and his dad, especially preying on Simba's innocence and trust--stylish and wicked.

Emperor's New Groove is good for the dumb guy who serves the evil queen. Funny portrait of a big-hearted musclehead.

The first Toy Story has a couple great songs, and the opening hour is golden. "Last Tuesday's Plastic Awareness meeting was, I think, a big success." "You're mocking me, aren't you?" "Please be a Mrs. Potatohead, please be a Mrs. Potatohead."

Maybe someday I'll do the same with cartoons of the last seven or so years that I wouldn;t have enjoyed without kids. I'm a better man for all of it, and more fun at parties, too, because, "You know, parties are fun."