Danny Elfman

So, let's do this thing. Ok, you start....

I'm going to warm up, ease back in, with a few randomosities from the past six weeks. See if you can spot the jokes.

*I've finally gotten the little ones to flinch when I enter the room.

*Potty training in earnest the past two days, with no-diaper shock treatment. There have been messes and successes. I think they will be trained when the latter outweighs the former. I have said "Who needs to go poopy-pee-pee" at least 12 times per hour.

*I thought the biting stage was over. I was wrong. Today, Gavin bit Darcy at the gym playroom, and per house rules, we had to go home. I said to the girl, because I was only halfway done with my mega-muscle-building workout, "Look at my triceps." No, I said, "Do we have to go, even if it's his sister?" I realized as I was saying it that it was silly. They're all meat to him.

*Not sure how it started, but I've been able to combine two loves of mine in the past month: air guitar and my kids, at least the ones small enough for me to lift and hold in the air.

There was dancing and iPodding one afternoon, and next thing I know I'm drumming on someone's head and playing piano on another's. Eureka! I picked up Darcy sideways and played her like a guitar. Instead of stinging, acid-scratched solos, there was tickling and laughing as one hand was on the "neck" and the other strummed.

Creativity was at a peak, and I lifted Maggie, with her facing away from me, raised one arm and blew on her hand like it was a saxophone and tickled her tummy like it was the holes on the reed (or whatever the terminology). More tickling and laughing.

They ask for it by name now. I think Connor would be a tuba, with me having to sit.

Oh, I'm exhausted. My blogging muscles are slack and I find myself short of breath. Must...slow...down....get....a....secretary....to....take...dic