MIA

Hmmm, these babies turn into toddlers and then into smartasses, huh?

Let's do this together: now that the huge milestones of sixth grade (Connor) and kindergarten and first tooth loss (both Maggie) all have happened, what milestones are next for the wee ones?

You, who have older kids than mine, chime in. Me, who can only guess....

1. First eye-roll at something I say
2. First joke played on me
3. First time I'm made fun of
4. First time I'm shown how to do something I can't figure out
5. First joke shared

I think #1 has happened, and they've tried #3, but I don't think it counts when I show them the ol' 'What's that on your chest, they look down and I run my finger up their face' trick and they immediately do it back to me.

Surprise is the key, kids.

Of course #5 has been attempted as well, but I'm not counting:

"Knock knock"
"Who's there?"
"Banana"
"Banana who?"
"Banana in your butt!"

Nor do I count it the fifth time it's used.

We almost got caught shirking our Tooth Fairy duties BTW. Maggie was so excited to get the world's loosest tooth out that she let Carrie show her how folks sometimes just go ahead and pull that thing out. She woke me up extremely excited that it came out one day last week, and handed me what appeared to be a chip off a tooth. It was in fact, the tooth.

They look so much bigger when they're attached to gums.

Anyway, I awoke the next night about 2 am, to some strange noise. Maybe that's what the Tooth Fairy does, wakes your forgetful ass up to do the right thing by knocking something over. I woke up Carrie to ask if she had put a dollar underneath Maggie's pillow or did we use the Tooth Fairy pillow we have for some reason that has its own little pocket and hangs from a doorknob?

She had done neither, but suggested an envelope to hold a dollar, then returned to Lala Land. Now here's a problem with folks using debit and credit cards so much these days--we rarely carry cash. Sucks for homeless folks, no?

Well, luckily, Carrie has a social life, and that includes needing cash for her and her friends' ventures. Her purse is like a waitress's, with cash hidden in all the folds and pockets and at the bottom. I found a buck, but thought it would be weird for a fairy to use an envelope.

Then, I had an idea. What if I wrote some weird shapes on the envelope, and called it fairy writing, and that the fairy letters spelled out Margaret? It was fun making up my own mini alphabet. Stuck it under her pillow and went back to bed.

She still believes in Santa and the Tooth Fairy, and will now be translating the Tooth Fairy Dictionary into English.

White Stripes

Quick refresher: the titles of each post are bands who have some connection with what is in the body of the post. Could be a lyric, could be an album title, date of an overdose...something.

This week all kids started some form of school. The difference is, instead of two forms of school, there are now three--middle, elementary and pre.

Yes, that means I have to remember three different times and places. Connor the sixth grader is fine for me: he can get on and get off his bus without anyone meeting him. Not kindergartner Maggie though. Someone has to walk her to the bus stop and stay with her, and if it's me because Carrie's working, the 4-year-old twins have to come with.

That didn't work out great today. Gavin wanted to bring books and go back home, and Darcy wanted to sit on me and Carrie. Both had to be reminded multiple times that sidewalks were for people and streets for vehicles. They didn't get that sending a child to kindergarten for the first time was a big deal, so let's not make it about them!

Then Maggie's bus didn't come, so we piled everyone in the van and drove her. First week of school, I understand the rough start; Connor's bus came so early he missed it, and thankfully his neighborhood friend's mom drove them. At noon, I had to haul the twins out to pick up Maggie from the bus. This will be a treat once the weather turns nasty.

The twins are backwith the Warenville Park District's preschool program, where they were with Maggie all last year. Familiar teachers, but unfamiliar other parents. Had a good group last year, with one dad who is a real sweetheart of a guy who has twin boys and loves his football. They moved to Yorkville this summer and we hope to go to their housewarming party soon.

But now I have to get used to new other-kids' parents. It's only a problem because for the most part I don't like people, so it's either fun times talking with folks I like while the kids play at the preschool playground before and after school or me being anti-social because I don't like to gush about how crazy parenting is or the latest cute thing they did (that's what Facebook is for, no?) or making small talk just to have something to say or laughing at lame jokes.

Other than that, I'm a real peach.

Bottom line: I've just about had enough of these critters and adjusting my life and work around them. Next year at this time, I will have half of each day to myself, as the twins start kindergarten.

Then I can really waste some me time.

Bye for now, and thanks for reading