Saturday, July 31, 2010

Squeeze

I thought I'd see how many neat-o moments from being a Senyor Madre I could list. The wee ones are going to Kindercare three times per week now, so I'm more Senyor than I am Madre lately. Before I forget:

*Reaching behind me while driving and grabbing Darcy or Gavin's toes and feeling them instinctively curl around my fingers.

*Listening to any of them sing to themselves while playing or drawing.

*Coming upstairs and finding Maggie on a bed or on the floor reading a book.

*Gavin sleeping late disguised as a blanket

*Anytime Maggie, Darcy and Gavin, in any combination, are caught hugging, kissing or both.

*Anytime they hug and kiss on Connor and you can see he loves being an older brother.

*When Darcy slam dances to any of my favorite music. When after an Eleventh Dream Day song in the car, Gavin says, "Daddy, do that one again." Ok, bud!

*When Gavin or Darcy say they want to watch or have me read "Hat in the Cat".

*Dropping them off at the gym's playroom, and Darcy turning to me and saying "Daddy, you go exercise."

*Seeing kids at the playroom or Kindercare get excited when they see Maggie, Darcy and Gavin come in.

*How brave Maggie is, from asking a bully to say sorry when she was 3, to insisting on practicing treading water in the pool.

*Any time they obey.


Time to go do other things now, as always, but you can guess that the preceding was a small sample of the wonders that balance the aggravations. Feel free to leave some of yours in the comments.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Ricardo Lemvo

Oops, missed the anniversary. Just too tired, fell asleep on a bedroom floor helping Darcy get to sleep.

Nevermind, here I am. 8:20 a.m. Three wee ones playing puppets upstairs with me, Carrie sleeping downstairs in our old-person first-floor master bedroom, Connor with his Dad for the weekend, three cups o'coffee already in me, listening to some Afro-Cuban All-Stars.

That musical group reminds me that Maggie at 4 is already having image issues with her brown skin. It ties in with my final ESL-certification class--Cross-Cultural Something or Other; how to educate and nurture kids from different cultures who are trying to assimilate in the dominant U.S. culture.

Now, Maggie is not from another culture, but she looks around at home and sees Irish skin everywhere but herself and me. She got my brown skin (naturally exacerbated in the summer), while Connor and Darcy got Carrie's North Atlantic ivory. Gavin is in between. Still, even the twins will say, "Daddy, you're brown, and Maggie is brown. I'm white."

With Hispanics expected to be half the U.S. population by 2050, Maggie may eventually feel more comfortable outside the home than in. Right now, she doesn't see many brown-skinned (not African American) kids at Kindercare or in playdates. In Carrie's women's group--most of the kids our kids know come from there--there are a couple families with Hispanic parents and their kids show it, too. I'll make sure to point them out from now on. Once elementary school begins in 2011, she'll blend more.

Maggie has told us a few times that she wishes she was lighter-skinned, and said yesterday that a girl at Kindercare made fun of her skin. Of course we tell her that she'll be so happy for it later, as Darcy will be with her unique curly-Q hair, and that that girl is just jealous. Then she says that the girl also has brown skin. Oh.

So there's no moral here or lesson or even a plea for advice. I'm proud that my skin reflects my heritage and looks great with yellow shirts, and we will be sure to dress Maggie in bright colors as well.